The Fruit Of The Spirit: The Fifth Fruit—Kindness

Most Christians probably agree that it would be nice to know exactly what God wants us to do in certain situations. For example, if your dear friend has been avoiding you lately, you might wish that God would specifically tell you what to do about it. Or perhaps you want to move to a different state because things have not been going well. You are not sure what to do. You wish God would tell you what to do, so you could do it!

In this new covenant era, however, God does not audibly speak to his people and give them exact instructions on what to do. Even in the old covenant, God rarely gave specific directions to his people. But remember, if you are a Christian, God has given you his Holy Spirit. You have a renewed heart and mind, which means you have the capability to pray, study Scripture, and discern how to navigate situations with wisdom. The answers are not always easy or evident, but in many ways, Christians are able to follow God’s will in life.

Following God’s will is a huge topic. Rather than going into the details, I want to give a different angle on God’s will. Even though we do not always know exactly what the Lord wants us to do in certain situations, we do know how he wants us to act in those situations. Even though we do not always know what decision is the best one, we do know how the Lord wants us to behave when we make decisions. We know that his will is this: in whatever situation we find ourselves, we should trust the Lord and obey his word. In all situations, circumstances, and decisions, we should trust in God and seek to obey his commands.

I know it sounds simple, but we sometimes forget it. Whatever situation you are facing, you do know how God wants you to act. He wants you to trust him and follow the teaching of his Word. In this discussion, the fruit of the Spirit is extremely relevant. The Spirit’s fruit is one of those teachings in Scripture that has to do with our day-to-day living. The fruit helps us know how to act in a way that pleases God and blesses other people. When you make decisions and face life’s various situations, do so in a way that helps you display the fruit of the Spirit. Specifically, in this article, I want to focus on kindness, the fifth fruit of the Spirit.

The Kindness of God

Let us consider Jesus’ words in Luke 6:35. There Jesus tells us that our heavenly Father is kind. In this context, kind means benevolent, considerable, and charitable toward people. Notice that the word is not nice. Nice means agreeable or polite. I live close enough to Minnesota to know the phrase “Minnesota nice.” This is when people are polite or agreeable simply to make interactions easier. For example, if I am in line at the store and someone cuts in front of me, I will be somewhat annoyed. Nevertheless, I will say, “It’s fine” to the person in order to avoid drama or conflict. I, too, can be “Minnesota nice.” But being nice is not the same as being kind. In other words, God is not nice. He is not agreeable or polite to avoid drama. But he is kind. He is charitable and benevolent. As we learned in previous articles, God is a loving, patient, and peace-making God.

Think again of Jesus’ statement: God is kind (Luke 6:35). Immediately after saying God is kind, Jesus also says that God is merciful (Luke 6:36). God’s kindness and mercy go together. He is compassionate and tender to weak, needy people. When Christ tells his disciples that our heavenly Father is kind and merciful, he is giving us a theology lesson about God’s character. Jesus is also echoing the truth of the Old Testament: “The Lord your God is a merciful God” (Deut 4:31). And, as David wrote, “The Lord . . . is filled with kindness” (Ps 145:17 NLT). Jesus teaches the truth: God is kind and merciful.

Of course, Scripture teaches other things about God. He is also just, powerful, omniscient, sovereign, just, and so on. We do not want to overemphasize one attribute of God and neglect others. We should be balanced when we think about God’s attributes. But in this article, we are thinking about the kindness of God—which, as Jesus said, is related to God’s mercy. These are characteristics that describe God to us.

We can also think about it through the grid of Paul’s teaching in 1 Corinthians 13: “Love is patient and kind” (v. 4). Indeed, God is love. And in his love, he is patient and kind. God is kind to people. He has a benevolent disposition toward his creatures. He is not a vindictive, manipulative, untrustworthy god who is mean and impatient. All of us probably know people who are grumpy, impatient, unkind, and angry like the main character of A Man Called Otto. Our God is not like that.

Even more, God is kind to unthankful and wicked people (Luke 6:35). He is kind toward people who forget to thank him for their food, health, home, friends, and family. We all know what it is like to do something kind for someone and never hear a “thank you.” If it happens enough, we may get disgruntled about it. But God does not get disgruntled when people are unthankful for his kindness. In his kindness, he is patient.

God is also kind to bad people—wicked people who are his enemies (Luke 6:35). He is kind to people who are compulsive liars, full of hatred, and guilty of sexual sin. He is kind to people who are living ungodly and immoral lifestyles. He is kind to people who hate him. We can see evidence of this in the world around us. We all know non-Christian people who live very un-Christian lives. Yet they have good health, a nice family, and a fine job. Even if that person does not recognize it, the good things in his life come from the kindness of God. Paul said something similar in his sermon to unbelievers in Lystra. He said that God showed them kindness by giving them rain, harvests, food, and happiness in life (Acts 14:17). Indeed, God’s unbelievable kindness should lead people to repentance (Rom 2:4)!

Application

As we think about God’s amazing kindness, we should recognize it in our own lives. God has been kind to us. He has lavished us with many good things. He has blessed us with food to eat, friends with which to enjoy life, and homes to live in. We have people in our lives who love us, and we even have clothes on our backs. These are evidence of God’s kindness toward us.

We should not only consider God’s kindness toward us but we should also thank him for it. Do not take his wonderful kindness for granted! None of us deserve God’s kindness. When we notice it in our lives, it should lead us to live a life of thankfulness to him. God’s kindness is another reason his people praise him from the heart.

The Height of God’s Kindness

On the summit of God’s kindness stands the cross. By nature, we are sinful, unthankful, and ungodly people who do not love God. But God is kind and merciful. He graciously saves sinners from the wages of sin through Christ’s death on the cross. In his kindness, he gives us his Spirit, washes away our sins, declares us righteous in his sight, and begins the great work of sanctification in our lives. In his kindness, he promises he will bring us all the way to glory. Oh, the incredible, staggering, majestic kindness of God!

If you are a Christian, you should be very familiar with God’s kindness. Peter says believers have “experienced the Lord’s kindness” (1 Pet 2:3 NET). You know from experience that God is kind to you in ways you cannot even explain. You have personally experienced the kindness of Jesus. You are a sinner saved by grace—a living testimony of God’s remarkable kindness. “O I can nev’r that day forget / when Jesus kindly spoke! / ‘Poor soul, my blood has paid thy debt / And now I break thy yoke!’”1

Kindness: The Fruit of the Spirit

Think back to Jesus’ words in Luke 6:27. He tells us to love our enemies and do good to people who hate us. Again, this is how God treats us. He is benevolent, kind, and patient toward sinners like us. Our ethic toward sinners should reflect that of God. We should follow our Father’s lead in showing kindness and mercy to sinners. The love we are called to show our enemies is kind (1 Cor 13:4). I once heard it said this way: “Kindness is putting love in action.”

Jesus’ teaching to love our enemies is intimately related to the fruit of the Spirit. Love is the first fruit of the Spirit. Love also shows up in our peacemaking, patience, and kindness toward others, including our enemies. Bearing the fruit of kindness is a call for all Christians. We are called to “put on kindness” and “above all, to put on love” (Col 3:12, 14). Our daily spiritual attire should include the wonderful garment of kindness and, most importantly, love.

Kindness to All

The kindness that Scripture calls us to show people does not discriminate. We are to be kind to all people. We must not pick and choose. Sadly, sometimes we discriminate when showing kindness. We tend to be kind to people we like or want to impress. Or we mostly show kindness to people who are like us. We avoid people we do not like or who are different from us. The fruit of the Spirit, however, does not discriminate. The Lord calls us to love and be kind to others.

All of us have people in life who are not our favorite people. We all know others with completely different views about major issues in life. Those are not reasons for us to be unkind or cold toward them. We should be kind to those we are called to love: whoever is our neighbor. This goes especially for pastors and elders: “A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone.” (2 Tim 2:24 NLT).

Kindness can be shown in countless ways. You can say kind words to people—words that encourage and cheer them up. You can use a kind tone when you talk to others. I especially think of kindness when I am talking to someone who deals with grumpy people all day while working in customer service. I try hard to be kind because I know they deal with unkind people all the time! You can be kind by listening to people—put your phone down and look them in the eye while they talk. You can be kind by paying for that woman’s coffee because you can tell she is having a rough day. You can show kindness by praying for others. Hospitality is a way to show “God’s kindness” (2 Sam 9:3). You can even be kind to others (in the right context) by handshakes, hugs, and warm smiles. One especially great way you can be kind to others is to tell them how the Lord has shown you kindness and rescued you from sin and death through Christ.

I should give a caveat: it does take wisdom to show kindness to cruel people. If someone is threatening you or seeking to cause you harm, you should stay away from that person unless others are with you. You can show kindness to cruel people, but you often have to do it from a distance or with the help of others. Kindness in this situation also means refusing to speak evil of someone. Kindness means telling the truth rather than speaking gossip or slander. Kindness also includes praying for these kinds of people. If a cruel person in your life truly needs help, kindness can be shown by arranging for others to help that person. There is more to this discussion. But remember to be cautious and wise when showing kindness to cruel people.

Kindness to Yourself

It probably sounds odd when I tell you: “Be kind to yourself.” But there is a good way to interpret that phrase. Remember, God loves you, cares for you, forgives your sins, and calls you his dear child in Christ. If you are unkind to yourself, hate yourself, or constantly tell yourself that you are worthless, those things are not in line with God’s truth. You are lying to yourself and being extremely unkind to yourself. Since God has been so kind to you, should you not be kind to yourself? And would it make sense for you to be kind to others but cruel to yourself? I do not think it is wrong to be kind to your neighbor as you are kind to yourself. Or, as Jesus said, do to other people what you would desire them to do to you (Luke 6:31). We treat others like we want to be treated: with kindness.

From a different angle, think about it this way: physical self-harm is wrong. You are made in God’s image. If I would purposely harm myself by cutting, overdosing, or extremely reckless behavior, I would be sinning. Similarly, it is wrong for me to mentally or emotionally harm myself by thinking untrue, hateful thoughts about myself. There is a proper self-love: God first, neighbor second, self third. There is also proper self-kindness. It is right and good for us to take care of ourselves. And it is right and good for us to think biblical thoughts about ourselves: God loves us! He cares for us even when we feel worthless. We are children of God no matter how we feel. Christ will never let us go. Christians can show self-kindness by thinking true biblical thoughts. If you are a Christian, you can “calm and quiet” your soul by remembering that you are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Ps 131:2; 139:14).

If you are a Christian who has engaged in self-abuse, let me remind you that God loves you more than you know. You are not the loser you think you are. You may have made many mistakes. You may have some real issues in life. You might not be the smartest, strongest, or best-looking person in the world. But you are precious in God’s sight! You are his beloved child who has been totally forgiven in Christ. You are a temple of his Holy Spirit, the apple of God’s eye. Someday, you will be perfect—literally and fully and really perfect! Be kind to yourself, for God has been kind to you.

Kindness toward Other Christians

Paul was clear when he directed Christians to be kind to each other (Eph 4:32). It is not an option or a call for some Christians. All Christians are called to be kind to all other Christians. This is one of the wonderful aspects of being part of Christ’s church. I have been to various churches and spent time with various Christian groups in various places, and I have experienced much Christian kindness throughout my life. I can say from much experience that the fruit of kindness sweetens life for God’s people.

But we can all grow in kindness. No Christian, no church is perfectly kind. One goal believers should have is to bear more fruit of kindness. How can we display more kindness in our lives? First, consider God’s kindness toward you. Meditate on the countless ways the Lord has been extremely kind to you. This will help fuel your mind with the divine reality and example of kindness. Second, ask God to forgive you for those times you have been unkind. Confess to God your failure to be kind. Third, pray for the help of the Spirit to grow in kindness. Put it on your prayer list! Finally, practice kindness. Take some concrete steps to be kind to people in your church family. Practice kindness by saying kind words to people, encouraging them, and showing affection.

Conclusion

If the Spirit is working in you, you will bear fruit—including the fruit of kindness. This is a wonderful reality. When you display the fruit of kindness, it is pleasing in God’s sight. Furthermore, when you show kindness to others, it is a great blessing to them, and it makes their lives more pleasant. Finally, displaying the fruit of kindness is also a blessing in itself. When you show kindness, you are keeping in step with the Spirit and doing what the Lord has called you to do. That is fulfilling! In other words, being kind to others is not just a duty. It is a delight!

Notes

  1. John Newton and Richard Cecil, “Humbled and Silenced by Mercy,” The Works of John Newton, vol. 3 (London: Hamilton, Adams & Co., 1824), 383.

© Shane Lems. All Rights Reserved.

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    Post authored by:

  • Shane Lems
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    Shane Lems is a graduate of Westminster Seminary California and has a DMin from RTS Orlando. He has been a church planter and pastor in the URCNA. Since 2013 he’s been serving as pastor of Covenant Presbyterian Church (OPC) in Hammond, WI. He is married and has four children. Shane has written numerous articles for Modern Reformation, New Horizons, and other publications. He is also the author of Doctrines of Grace: Student Edition and manages a book blog, The Reformed Reader.

    More by Shane Lems ›

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One comment

  1. It is remarkable how much benefit can be gained from one word, but the author’s explanation of kindness shows the depth of the riches of Scripture. Nicely done and an encouraging article.
    Thank you,
    Barry

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