Too Legit, Too Legit to Quit

MC Hammer Called. He wants His Costume Back

Swiss Guards

Credit AP

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7 comments

  1. Uh, oh. A local praise band might be looking for more hip attire. Don’t give the “worship leader” any ideas.

  2. Hey, everybody, have you got a flowah
    That changes lives, ooooh, what a powah
    Comin’ from mah homies, number one is Piper
    But he’s Baptistic, ooooh, makes me shudder

    TULIP is the flowah everybody’s pickin’
    Even heretics, just look at Rick Warren
    It’s so cool, jump on the bandwagon
    Just so you know, that’s not the Reformation

    TULIP! TULIP! TU-TU-TU-TULIP!
    Not the Reformation
    TULIP! TULIP! TU-TU-TU-TULIP!
    Just look at Rick Warren
    TULIP! TULIP! TU-TU-TU-TULIP!
    Number one is Piper
    TULIP! TULIP! TU-TU-TU-TULIP!
    Ooooh, it makes me shudder

    (Repeat indefinitely until crowd frenzy ensues)

  3. Cracker Jack has a prize in every box (now usually stickers or a temporary tattoo), but in Europe they have these delightful hollow german chocolate “Kinder Eggs” with toys inside. They had so many cool little articulated creatures you could put together, but once in a while the toys were lame. We’ll never forget the worst one we ever got; a tiny plastic statuette of a Swiss Guard. Forevermore in our family when a present is a disappointment, somebody will mutter under their breath, “aww man! Swiss Guard!”

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